Random Question Generator for Couples: 300 Questions in 4 Moods: how it works
This random question generator for couples deals one card at a time: press New question, ask your partner, then answer it yourself. The list holds 300 questions in four chips: getting to know you, memories, future plans and light-hearted. Every card has a follow-up, so a one-word answer is never the end. Nothing is explicit, and no card is a trap.
Why ask what you think you already know
The Gottman Institute calls your picture of your partner's inner world a Love Map, and its advice is short: "The key is to stay curious about your partner." Its example is asking what your partner currently enjoys doing for fun, because interests change over time. Our Getting to know you chip works the same ground with questions of our own; this page is not affiliated with or endorsed by the Gottman Institute. People stop asking once they assume they know.
Four chips, four moods
Light-hearted is for the car or a slow line: who hogs the blanket, who is the better navigator. Memories suits an anniversary dinner, because two people rarely remember a day the same way. Future plans works best with a calendar in reach, since many follow-ups ask for a first step or a date. Keep Getting to know you for a quiet evening.
Tips
Both of you answer every card. The person who drew it goes second, so nobody feels interviewed.
Skip any card without giving a reason. Draws do not repeat until all 300 have come up.
On a long drive, set the timer to five minutes. A new card appears when it ends, and the passenger reads it out.
Questions and answers
Are these questions suitable for a new couple?
Yes, with one note. Nothing on the list is explicit, and no card asks about former partners, money or health. Memories assumes you share some history, so on a third date start with Light-hearted and Getting to know you. No card is a loyalty test of the "would you still love me if" kind.
How many questions should we do in one sitting?
Fewer than you expect. With the follow-up, and with both of you answering, one card can last as long as a starter. Leave the count on 1 and stop while it is still fun. To plan ahead, set the count to 5 and tap the heart on the two you like best.
Where do the questions come from?
We wrote all 300 for this page: 75 in each chip. No card deck, book or Gottman Institute list is reproduced, and none repeats a card from our general question list. The page is a conversation starter, not counseling, and the full list is printed at the bottom.
How do you feel about holding hands or a quick kiss when other people are around?Follow-up: Where is the line for you?
How do you feel about how we split weekends between doing things and doing nothing?Follow-up: Which way would you tilt it?
How do you like to be cheered on when you are working toward something?Follow-up: Do you prefer check-ins or to be left to it?
How do you like to be comforted when plans fall through?Follow-up: What is a good backup plan for us?
How do you like to be greeted when you walk through the door?Follow-up: When did I last get it exactly right?
How do you like to celebrate a small win?Follow-up: Which recent one did we let slide by?
How do you like to say sorry: in words, with a gesture or by fixing it?Follow-up: How do you like to hear it from me?
How do you like to spend the first ten minutes after we both get home?Follow-up: What would make those minutes better?
How do you prefer to decide things together: talk it through at once or sleep on it?Follow-up: Which recent choice should we have slept on?
What about my childhood are you curious about and have never asked?Follow-up: What made you wonder?
What are you like when you are worn out, and what do you want from me then?Follow-up: What should I definitely not do?
What are you looking forward to that you have not mentioned yet?Follow-up: How can I help make it happen?
What are you proud of from this past month?Follow-up: Did I notice at the time?
What did you do before we met that you would like to do again?Follow-up: Would you want me along?
What do you like about how we are different?Follow-up: Which difference took the most getting used to?
What do you like best about the way we talk to each other?Follow-up: What would you change?
What do you like to hear from me when you are nervous about something?Follow-up: What is the wrong thing to say?
What do you most enjoy doing for me?Follow-up: Do I thank you for it enough?
What do you need more of right now: time alone, time with me or time with friends?Follow-up: What would one step toward that look like this week?
What do you think you are easy to live with about?Follow-up: Where do you know you are hard work?
What do you wish I understood about your work or studies?Follow-up: What would help me get it?
What do you wish we had more time for?Follow-up: What could we drop to make room for it?
What do you wish you had more energy for at the moment?Follow-up: What is draining it?
What does a good morning look like for you before we have even spoken?Follow-up: What is the first thing you want to hear from me?
What helps most after a rough day: talking, quiet or a distraction?Follow-up: How can I tell which one you need without asking?
What is a compliment from me that you still remember?Follow-up: What made that one stick?
What is a dream you had as a teenager that you have never told me?Follow-up: Does any part of it still appeal?
What is a food you think I only pretend to like?Follow-up: Am I right about one of yours?
What is a little thing that makes our home feel like ours?Follow-up: What would you add next?
What is a question you have always wanted to ask me?Follow-up: What did you think my answer would be?
What is a small thing I do that makes you feel looked after?Follow-up: Is there one you would like more often?
What is a topic you could teach me about for a whole evening?Follow-up: Where would you start?
What is a view of yours that has shifted since we got together?Follow-up: What nudged it, and did I notice at the time?
What is a word or phrase we use that nobody else would understand?Follow-up: Where did it come from?
What is a worry you had lately that turned out to be nothing?Follow-up: What helped you let it go?
What is it like inside your head when you are really concentrating?Follow-up: How should I interrupt you if I must?
What is on your mind most this week?Follow-up: Is there anything I could take off your plate because of it?
What is the best way to wake you up?Follow-up: And the worst way?
What is the most "you" thing in our home?Follow-up: And the most "me" thing?
What is your favorite room to be in with me?Follow-up: What do we usually do there?
What is your favorite thing we do together that needs no planning at all?Follow-up: How often would you like to do it?
What is your favorite way for us to end the day?Follow-up: What gets in the way most often?
What is your favorite way for us to spend an evening with no plans?Follow-up: When did we last have one like that?
What is your ideal Saturday morning with me?Follow-up: What are we having for breakfast?
What kind of day makes you want a hug the second you see me?Follow-up: What kind of day makes you want ten minutes to yourself first?
What kind of message from me makes you smile in the middle of the day?Follow-up: What time of day is it most welcome?
What kind of surprise do you actually enjoy?Follow-up: What kind would you rather I never planned?
What makes you feel appreciated at home?Follow-up: When did you last feel that way?
What makes you feel close to me on a busy day?Follow-up: Could we build that into most days?
What music would you put on for a slow Sunday with me?Follow-up: Which song would I veto?
What pace do you like on a day out: packed or wandering?Follow-up: How do we meet in the middle?
What part of your day do you most want to tell me about when you get home?Follow-up: Which part do you usually skip?
What rabbit hole have you gone down lately that I have not heard about?Follow-up: What is the best thing you found at the bottom of it?
What small thing could I do in the morning that would make your day easier?Follow-up: What could you do for mine?
What would you like me to ask you about more often?Follow-up: What is the latest news on it?
What would you like to be good at a year from now?Follow-up: How could I back you up?
What would you like us to try this month that we have never done?Follow-up: What is the smallest version of it we could do this week?
What would you love a whole day to yourself for?Follow-up: What would you want to tell me about it afterwards?
What would you put on a list called "things that always make me feel better"?Follow-up: Which of them can I help with?
When do you feel most listened to by me?Follow-up: What am I doing differently in those moments?
When do you feel most relaxed around me?Follow-up: What are we usually doing at the time?
When you go quiet, what is usually going on?Follow-up: Would you like me to ask, or wait?
Where does your mind go lately when it wanders?Follow-up: Is it a plan, a worry or a daydream?
Which chore do you secretly not mind doing?Follow-up: Which one would you trade away first?
Which couple we know do you admire?Follow-up: What do they do that we could borrow?
Which meal that I make do you like best?Follow-up: What would you like me to learn to cook next?
Which of my interests would you like to understand better?Follow-up: What part of it puzzles you most?
Which of our shared jokes never gets old for you?Follow-up: Which one should we retire?
Which of your family's habits would you like us to keep?Follow-up: Which one are you happy to leave behind?
Which of your friends do you wish I knew better?Follow-up: What would be an easy way for the three of us to spend time?
Which of your habits do you think I find odd?Follow-up: Which of mine do you find odd?
Which of your interests would you like me to try once with you?Follow-up: What would a gentle first go look like?
Which of your routines matters most to you?Follow-up: How can I protect it for you?
Which place near us do you wish we went to more?Follow-up: What stops us, and can we fix it?
Who understands you well, apart from me?Follow-up: What do they get about you that took me a while?
Memories 75
How did meeting my family or friends for the first time go from your side?Follow-up: Who put you at ease?
What did I do early on that made you trust me?Follow-up: Did I know it mattered?
What did we do on our first date, as you remember it?Follow-up: What were you nervous about?
What did we use to do all the time and have stopped?Follow-up: Shall we bring it back?
What did you first notice about how I treat other people?Follow-up: Has it held true?
What did you learn about me on our first trip away?Follow-up: What do you think I learned about you?
What did you think of my taste in music when we met?Follow-up: Which song of mine have you come round to?
What did your friends or family say after they first met me?Follow-up: Which comment did you keep to yourself until now?
What do you remember about the first time we met?Follow-up: What did you tell a friend about me afterwards?
What do you remember about the first time you saw where I lived?Follow-up: What did it tell you about me?
What is a little thing from our first year that you miss?Follow-up: Could we do it this week?
What is a meal we ruined together?Follow-up: What did we eat instead?
What is the best celebration we have had together?Follow-up: What were we celebrating?
What is the best day we have spent at home without going out?Follow-up: What did we eat?
What is the best meal we have ever shared?Follow-up: Was it the food, the place or the mood?
What is the best piece of advice I have given you?Follow-up: Did you take it right away?
What is the best surprise I have ever given you?Follow-up: Did you suspect anything?
What is the best thing we have ever built, made or fixed together?Follow-up: Would we do it again?
What is the best thing we have found by accident: a place, a dish or a song?Follow-up: How did we stumble on it?
What is the best view we have seen together?Follow-up: What did we say when we got there?
What is the best walk we have ever been on?Follow-up: What did we talk about on the way?
What is the first inside joke we ever had?Follow-up: Does it still work?
What is the first nickname you had for me?Follow-up: What did I make of it at the time?
What is the first thing I ever said that made you laugh?Follow-up: Do I still make that kind of joke?
What is the first thing one of us taught the other?Follow-up: How good was the student?
What is the funniest misunderstanding we have had?Follow-up: How long did it take to clear up?
What is the hardest we have ever laughed together?Follow-up: Can you still set me off by mentioning it?
What is the kindest thing I have done for you that I may have forgotten?Follow-up: Why did it matter that day?
What is the longest conversation we have ever had?Follow-up: What kept it going?
What is the luckiest thing that has happened to us?Follow-up: What if it had gone the other way?
What is the most "us" photo we never took?Follow-up: What would it show?
What is the most fun we have had doing a boring job together?Follow-up: How did we make it fun?
What is the most lost we have ever been together?Follow-up: Who got us out of it?
What is the most out of character thing you have done because of me?Follow-up: Would you do it again?
What is the most spontaneous thing we have done together?Follow-up: Whose idea was it?
What is your favorite memory of us in bad weather?Follow-up: Did we plan to be out in it?
What is your favorite memory of us with friends?Follow-up: Who else would remember it?
What is your favorite photo of us?Follow-up: What was happening just outside the frame?
What small moment with me do you think about more than I would guess?Follow-up: What brings it back?
What was our best journey together, counting only the getting there?Follow-up: What did we do to pass the time?
What was the first film we watched together?Follow-up: Did we actually pay attention to it?
What was the first gift you gave me, and how did you choose it?Follow-up: How do you think it went down?
What was the first thing of mine you borrowed and kept?Follow-up: Do I know you still have it?
What was the first thing we disagreed about that did not matter at all?Follow-up: Who still thinks they were right?
What was the first thing we ever cooked together?Follow-up: How did it turn out?
What was your first impression of me?Follow-up: When did it change?
What were you most nervous to tell me early on?Follow-up: How did I react?
When did I last surprise you by being good at something?Follow-up: What did you expect instead?
When did I look after you in a way you still remember?Follow-up: What did I get exactly right?
When did I make you feel brave?Follow-up: What did you do next?
When did we first say "we" instead of "I" about a plan?Follow-up: Did you notice at the time?
When did we get the giggles somewhere we should not have?Follow-up: Who started it, and who made it worse?
When did we last dance, even badly, in the kitchen or anywhere else?Follow-up: What was playing, and who led?
When did we last stay up far too late talking?Follow-up: What was the subject?
When did you first feel at home with me?Follow-up: What were we doing?
When did you first realize you liked me?Follow-up: What did you do about it?
When did you last look across a room at me and feel glad?Follow-up: What was I doing?
When was one of us right and the other had to admit it?Follow-up: How gracious was the loser?
When were we both exhausted and still had a good time?Follow-up: What kept us going?
When were we completely in sync?Follow-up: How did we know?
When were you most proud of me?Follow-up: Did you tell me at the time?
Which birthday with me has been your favorite?Follow-up: What made that one stand out?
Which moment from this past year would you put in a frame?Follow-up: Where would you hang it?
Which moment made you think we make a good team?Follow-up: What was each of us doing?
Which night away with me do you remember best?Follow-up: What made the place memorable?
Which note, message or card from me have you kept?Follow-up: Where is it now?
Which of our early dates seemed to go badly at the time?Follow-up: What makes it funny now?
Which of our plans went completely wrong and ended up better?Follow-up: What rescued it, or who did?
Which of our trips would you happily repeat day for day?Follow-up: Which day of it was the best?
Which ordinary day with me turned out to be a great one?Follow-up: What was the moment that tipped it?
Which place will always be "our place" to you?Follow-up: What would you order or do there tomorrow?
Which song takes you straight back to our early days?Follow-up: Where were we when it was playing?
Which story about us do you love telling other people?Follow-up: Which part do you exaggerate?
Which tradition of ours started by accident?Follow-up: What would break it?
Which year of ours so far has been your favorite?Follow-up: What were our weekends like then?
Future plans 75
How could I be a better partner to you in the coming year?Follow-up: What would that look like on a Tuesday?
How do you want us to make big decisions in the future?Follow-up: What worked well the last time?
How should we handle busy stretches when we barely see each other?Follow-up: What small ritual would keep us connected?
How should we mark the next big birthday either of us has?Follow-up: Who has to be there?
How would you like us to mark the end of each year?Follow-up: What would we look back on first?
How would you like us to spend the next long weekend?Follow-up: Home, away or a bit of both?
If we both had next Friday free, what should we do with it?Follow-up: What would we need to book or pack?
If we took a month off together, how would we spend it?Follow-up: Where would we be by week three?
If we wrote a letter to ourselves to open in five years, what should it say?Follow-up: Where would we keep it?
What about the next few years are you unsure about that we could talk through?Follow-up: What would make it feel lighter?
What animal, if any, do you picture in our future?Follow-up: Who would end up walking or feeding it?
What do you picture when you imagine us in ten years?Follow-up: What are we doing on a normal evening?
What do you want our home to feel like to a guest?Follow-up: What gives a home that feeling?
What do you want to do alone in the coming year that I can cheer on?Follow-up: How would you like me to help?
What do you want us to stop putting off?Follow-up: What is the first ten-minute step?
What is on your list for us to do before the end of this year?Follow-up: Which one can we put a date on tonight?
What is one habit you would like us to build together?Follow-up: When in the day would it fit?
What is one thing you want us to learn together?Follow-up: Who do you think will pick it up faster?
What is the smallest change that would make our daily life better?Follow-up: Can we try it tomorrow?
What is your idea of a great week off at home for the two of us?Follow-up: Which rule would make it feel like a real break?
What kind of hosts do you want us to be?Follow-up: What would we serve the first time?
What kind of old couple do you hope we become?Follow-up: Which older couple do you have in mind?
What outdoor thing should we plan for next summer?Follow-up: Who else should come?
What should we do the next time we both have a bad week?Follow-up: What would we ban for the evening?
What would a perfect anniversary look like to you?Follow-up: How much of it should be a surprise?
What would a slower life look like for us?Follow-up: Which part of it could we try now?
What would our dream home have that our home does not?Follow-up: Which room would you fight for?
What would we do with a free afternoon if nobody could reach us?Follow-up: Which part of that could we do this week?
What would you change about our home in the next six months?Follow-up: What is the first small job?
What would you like more of in our life next year?Follow-up: What would you like less of?
What would you like our evenings to be free of?Follow-up: What would we fill the space with?
What would you like our mornings to be like in the future?Follow-up: Which piece of that could we start now?
What would you like our weekends to look like a year from now?Follow-up: What is one change that would get us there?
What would you like to celebrate with me five years from now?Follow-up: How would we mark it?
What would you like to do for my next birthday?Follow-up: Should I know about it in advance?
What would you like us to be better at as a team?Follow-up: What would practice look like?
What would you like us to be doing together when we are both retired?Follow-up: Where are we living in that picture?
What would you like us to build into every month?Follow-up: Which week suits it?
What would you like us to collect, keep or record as the years go by?Follow-up: Where would we store it?
What would you like us to do every year on the same date?Follow-up: Which date would you pick?
What would you like us to do for someone else this year?Follow-up: Who comes to mind?
What would you like us to get better at talking about?Follow-up: What makes it hard to start?
What would you like us to get outside and do more often?Follow-up: What is the easiest version of it near here?
What would you like us to grow, make or build in the next year?Follow-up: Where would it go?
What would you like us to know how to do that our grandparents knew?Follow-up: Who could teach us?
What would you like us to make a regular date night?Follow-up: Which night of the week works?
What would you like us to read, watch or listen to together next?Follow-up: How would we find the time?
What would you like us to say yes to more often?Follow-up: What should we start saying no to?
What would you like us to try that scares you a little?Follow-up: What would make it less scary?
What would you put on a shared list of places to eat before next year?Follow-up: Which one do we go to first?
Where do you want us to be this time next year, in any sense?Follow-up: What would tell us we had got there?
Where would you like us to travel next?Follow-up: What is the first thing we would do when we arrived?
Where would you like us to watch the sun come up one day?Follow-up: What would be in the flask?
Which adventure do you want us to have while we still have the energy?Follow-up: What needs to happen first?
Which big question do you think we should talk about this year?Follow-up: When would be a good time for it?
Which chore or errand should we turn into something we do together?Follow-up: What would make it less of a chore?
Which city or town could you see us living in one day?Follow-up: What would our street be like?
Which class would you take with me?Follow-up: What would we make or do in the first lesson?
Which corner of our home should we change first?Follow-up: What would it become?
Which festival, event or concert would you like us to get to one day?Follow-up: Who else would we bring?
Which friends would you like us to see more of next year?Follow-up: What would make that easy?
Which goal of mine would you like to be part of?Follow-up: What role would suit you?
Which goal of yours could I help with this year?Follow-up: What is the very next step?
Which language would be fun for us to learn before a trip?Follow-up: Where would we go to try it out?
Which meal do you want us to master together?Follow-up: Who chops and who stirs?
Which memory do you want us to make this year?Follow-up: What needs planning now?
Which new food, place or activity do you want to try with me this season?Follow-up: When are we both free?
Which of our routines should we shake up?Follow-up: What would we swap it for?
Which part of how we are now do you want to protect as life gets busier?Follow-up: What would protecting it take?
Which part of the world do you want us to see together before anywhere else?Follow-up: What draws you to it?
Which place do you want to show me that I have never seen?Follow-up: What would we do on the first day there?
Which project would you love us to take on together?Follow-up: What would each of us be in charge of?
Which skill would you like one of us to have by next summer?Follow-up: Which of us should learn it?
Which tradition should we start that is ours alone?Follow-up: What would make it stick?
Which trip do you want to take with me when we are old?Follow-up: What pace would we go at?
Light-hearted 75
If I were a type of vacation, which would I be: city break, beach or camping trip?Follow-up: Which kind of vacation are you?
If our home had one house rule painted on the wall, what would it say?Follow-up: Who breaks it most?
If we could only keep one of our mugs, which one survives?Follow-up: Whose mug is it really?
If we could only say five words to each other tomorrow, which five would you pick?Follow-up: Which word would you miss most?
If we had a family crest, what would be on it?Follow-up: What is the motto?
If we had matching jackets, what would be written on the back?Follow-up: Would you actually wear yours?
If we had to enter a talent show as a duo, what is our act?Follow-up: What goes wrong on the night?
If we had to swap one item of clothing for a day, what would you take?Follow-up: What should I never take of yours?
If we ran a bed and breakfast, what would the reviews complain about?Follow-up: What would they praise?
If we swapped jobs for a day, who would do worse?Follow-up: What would go wrong first?
If we went on a game show as a pair, what kind of show would suit us?Follow-up: Who presses the buzzer?
If we were a pair of cartoon characters, what would we be called?Follow-up: Who is the sensible one?
If we were a snack duo, which two snacks would we be?Follow-up: Which of us is the salty one?
What do I do that is exactly like one of my parents?Follow-up: Do I know I do it?
What do I take far too seriously?Follow-up: When did it last make you laugh?
What do we call by the wrong name on purpose at home?Follow-up: How did that start?
What is my most predictable order at a restaurant?Follow-up: What is yours, in my opinion?
What is my signature phrase?Follow-up: How good is your impression of me saying it?
What is my tell when I am pretending to like something?Follow-up: When did you last see it?
What is the funniest thing I have said half asleep?Follow-up: Did I deny it in the morning?
What is the most "us" thing to order for the table?Follow-up: Who eats more of it?
What is the most ridiculous nickname we have for each other?Follow-up: Would you ever say it in front of people?
What is the most useless thing we own together?Follow-up: Who insisted on it?
What is the oddest thing I have ever brought home?Follow-up: Is it still here?
What is the pettiest competition we have going?Follow-up: What is the score?
What is the strangest thing I do in my sleep or just before it?Follow-up: Do I believe you when you tell me?
What is the strangest thing we both find funny?Follow-up: Who did we fail to explain it to?
What is the thing I always lose?Follow-up: Where does it usually turn up?
What is the worst matching costume we could wear?Follow-up: What is the best one?
What tiny thing will I never back down on?Follow-up: Have you given up arguing about it?
What would a nature film narrator say about us on a Sunday morning?Follow-up: What happens when one of us gets hungry?
What would a sitcom about us be called?Follow-up: What is the running joke?
What would be in a museum exhibit about the two of us?Follow-up: What does the little card next to it say?
What would I be arrested for in a town with very silly laws?Follow-up: What would your crime be?
What would I be doing in a painting of me at home?Follow-up: What is the painting called?
What would my entry in a field guide say?Follow-up: What is my natural habitat?
What would my job be in a medieval village?Follow-up: What would yours be?
What would my superhero weakness be?Follow-up: What would defeat you?
What would our stall be at a village fair?Follow-up: Who does the shouting?
What would our team name be at a quiz night?Follow-up: Which round would we win?
What would our two-person detective agency be called?Follow-up: Which of us does the talking?
Which animal am I most like when I first wake up?Follow-up: Which one are you?
Which dance move should I be banned from doing?Follow-up: Can you demonstrate it?
Which film that I love do you think is terrible?Follow-up: How many times have you sat through it?
Which of my opinions about food is just wrong?Follow-up: What would it take to convert me?
Which of us is more likely to cry at a film about a dog?Follow-up: When was that last proved?
Which of us is more likely to talk to a stranger's dog?Follow-up: What do they say to it?
Which of us is the better cook under pressure?Follow-up: What is the emergency dinner?
Which of us is the better driver, honestly?Follow-up: What is your evidence?
Which of us is the better loser at games?Follow-up: What does the worse one do?
Which of us packs worse for a trip?Follow-up: What did they forget last time?
Which of us would a cat choose to sit on?Follow-up: What does the other one do wrong?
Which of us would adopt every animal at a shelter?Follow-up: Which animal would the other one draw the line at?
Which of us would be better at keeping a surprise party secret?Follow-up: What would give the other one away?
Which of us would be first out of a baking contest?Follow-up: What went wrong with the bake?
Which of us would be the stricter teacher?Follow-up: What subject would they teach?
Which of us would cope better in the year 1500?Follow-up: What would the other one complain about first?
Which of us would last longer without a phone?Follow-up: What would they crack for?
Which of us would put a flat-pack wardrobe together faster?Follow-up: How many screws are left over?
Which of us would survive longer on a desert island?Follow-up: What would the other one's first mistake be?
Which song do I sing most often without noticing?Follow-up: How accurate are the lyrics, as I sing them?
Who falls asleep first during a film?Follow-up: How far in, on average?
Who hogs the blanket?Follow-up: What is the defense?
Who is more likely to start a conversation in a line?Follow-up: How long before the other one joins in?
Who is the better gift wrapper?Follow-up: What does the other one's wrapping look like?
Who is the better navigator?Follow-up: When did that last get tested?
Who is the better storyteller at dinner?Follow-up: What does the other one do while they tell it?
Who is the fussier eater?Follow-up: What is the most ridiculous item on their list?
Who really controls the temperature at home?Follow-up: What is the right number?
Who takes longer to get out of the house?Follow-up: What are they doing in those last five minutes?
Who takes up more of the sofa?Follow-up: What is their preferred position?
Who would be the first to get us thrown out of a library?Follow-up: What would the offense be?
Who would do better on a quiz about the other one?Follow-up: Which question would trip the loser up?
Who would make the better spy?Follow-up: What would blow the other one's cover?
Who would win if we raced to the end of the street right now?Follow-up: What is the loser's excuse?
How this list was compiled: All 300 questions and their follow-ups were written for this page by the Random Generator HQ editors; none is copied from another list, a card deck or a book, and none appears on our general, daily or kids lists. Each one was read against the house rules before it went in: a partner can answer it aloud in about a minute, it is not explicit, it does not ask about former partners, it is not a loyalty test of the 'would you still love me if' kind, and it stays away from money, health, bodies, looks, politics, religion and painful memories. It names no brand, show or living person. The page copy mentions the Gottman Institute's Love Maps idea, that partners keep asking each other questions because interests and worries change over time, and quotes one sentence from its article at https://www.gottman.com/blog/how-to-build-love-maps/ (read on 2026-09-19; published 17 February 2022, updated 11 May 2026). No list or exercise of theirs is reproduced here, and this page is not affiliated with or endorsed by the Gottman Institute. The four groups are our own sorting: Getting to know you (75), Memories (75), Future plans (75) and Light-hearted (75). The questions have no right answer, so they need no fact-checking. First written 2026-09-18. Second pass 2026-09-19 by the Random Generator HQ review desk, separate from the first write: every question and follow-up was read again for sense, safety and duplicates of idea; six cards were replaced and eight follow-ups rewritten. Licence: own work